Happy 2013 to all Staff, and Mafiosos! I hope this year brings you all the best and seeing as those fucking Mayans were wrong and set the whole world into a temporary paranoia spin, about Armageddon and all that, I hope for a chilled out future for everyone. The same cannot be said for my daily admin job, I am afraid to report. Same shit different day. Some players just seem to go out of their way to make our lives at staff difficult. According to TMB standards, I should call them c**ts, but they have neither the depth nor the warmth.

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Player Query: STORM!!! I got this message in my inbox: “Fuck you, you fucking stinking *GINGER* Jewish cunt curry munching Indian dog eating gook Jesus hippie Nazi fuck!” – I want this player banned please! They cannot use language like this!

Storm: Looks like they covered almost all the bases, eh?

Player: Excuse me?

Storm:.....Ok I am checking mailboxes – one minute please...Okay, so I do note that before you got that message, you said you were going to chutney-rape his baby sister after you ate 5 Viagra and bedazzled your dick with metal spikes, so there was a certain degree of provocation from your side, and also you did personally threaten this players family.

Player: .....What do you mean? And what is “Chutney-rape”?

Storm: Anal Penetration- and you used the term “ass fuck” to be precise – that can never be a good thing to say to anyone...So what I mean basically is, that you started it all and upset the other player which means you have both sort of broken the rules. But you started it and then complained to me first....So what we can do is block each other and cancel it out, or I simply freeze or ban both of you?

Player: Yes but he called me a GINGER, man!

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Storm: Excuse you?

Player: I am not a fucking GINGER!

Storm: Sorry but I think it best if you just kept quiet at this point.

Player: What the hell?!?!? I come to lay a complaint with you and you want to ban me and tell ME to keep quiet? What the fuck? He called me a GINGER!

Storm: Listen, I am not going to do anything about your complaint, and I am sending warnings to you and the other player about both your conducts and I want you to note that we take a very strong distaste toward any form of racism in the game. So consider yourself warned as well. If you don’t like it I will simply just ban you.

Player: You cannot ban me? I bought a sub and turns! I support this game!

Storm: I don’t care. You behaviour is disgusting, now stop wasting my time.

Player: So you support and side with Gingers? GO FUCK YOUR SELF YOU FUCKING GINGER LOVING CUNT!

Storm: *Pushes the BAN Button*

*Please note that no *GINGERS* were harmed during the production of this Blog*

*We apologise to all GINGERS for this post, it is not meant or intended in any way to demean your GINGER asses, but is written as a recount of actual events.*

* Some of my best friends are GINGERS*